Jessica Writes. Sometimes. : Sunsets

First sunset in Mazunte, Punta Cometa

I have to admit that I feel sad right now. I also have to admit that I am shocked that I feel sad. Yesterday, I left Zipolite. In my life, I have never mastered the art of being still nor being alone. When I was a kid, my mom hung a list on the fridge of things I could do by myself when I got bored because I could not figure it out on my own. Usually, if I have a “lazy” day, after about 5 hours, I start to feel guilty and make a plan. At the end of a day, I look back and assess what I have “accomplished.” Here I am now, after completing 3 weeks on the coast, rarely having a plan, only moving once, accomplishing very little in any material sense, and feeling blissfully relaxed and content. I lack the words to truly capture what I am feeling right now. But, something, something quite incredible in its simplicity, happened in me that I have never encountered before in my life, and I did not even have to complete a 10-day silent meditation retreat to get there.

Sunset, Mazunte

Nearly everyday for the past three weeks, I watched the sunset. In fact, many days, the sunset was the only planned event. I found myself amazed that even though the sun sets everyday, each day it puts on a unique show. Sometimes, after a particularly hard day, it rushes into the sea, appearing to be in a hurry to finish its job. Other times it takes its time, weaving its way through the clouds like a beautiful woman weaving through a crowd, but never disappearing in it. Then there were the few days that the clouds hid the sun completely, leaving only a pink hue emanating as the sun dipped secretly into the sea. I wondered to myself if maybe the sun did something embarrassing that day, choosing to tiptoe out the backdoor instead of its normal grand show. In contrast, on the most magnificent days the sun would set with a vigor, excited to share its happiness. Those days, it would cast a spotlight on all who took the time to watch, allowing us to feel like we were part of the show.

Sunset, Punta Cometa, Mazunte

Sunset obscured by clouds, Zipolite

Sunset between the rocks, Zipolite

Not only did the sun change it’s dance everyday, but I, too, found myself adjusting my approach to that time. I tried to watch it from as many locations as I could to see the majesty from every angle possible. When I could share it with a friend, I could not help but verbally declare how beautiful it was over…and over. On my own, I would take pictures. And then, I would make myself stop taking pictures so I could just enjoy it. Sometimes, I would make eye contact with a stranger, and we would silently share the deep admiration we were both experiencing. In Zipolite, I often found myself enjoying a beer with the sunset, feeling my body sigh as the ocean made room for the sun. Other days, I did yoga on the beach, trying a more spiritual approach. Sometimes there were Bob Marley songs floating behind me other times it was just the sound of the waves. It was probably good that I did not stay longer as I am not sure my eyes could take too many more days of staring at the sun, but now when I close my eyes, the image lingers in my soul.

Sunset with Michelada, Zipolite

Sunset with Coconuts, Zipolite

I am humbled by the consistency of the sunset. And how taking the time to honor that daily action impressed something so profound into me. Yesterday morning my yoga teacher told us to set our intention for our practice. My intention was to take this time at the ocean with me, to embody it. So, while I may not be able to watch the sunset everyday for the rest of my life, hopefully, it has found its way into some crevice of my being.